Want To Convince Anyone To Do Anything? Here Is Where Start.

By Rob McKenna

How To Win Friends & Influence People By Dale Carnegie

If you want to convince anyone to do anything, this is a good start, anachronistic early 20th-century pop culture references aside. Mind the difference between charm and dissimulation.

Handling People
A. Don’t criticize, condemn, or complain (focus on your own eye)
B. Give honest and sincere appreciation
C. Arouse in the other person an eager want

Making People Like You
A. Become genuinely interested in others (paradigm shift!)
B. Smile!
C. Remember names (first names!)
D. Talk the other person’s interests
E. Be a good listener (ought to be the first and last lesson here)
F. Sincerely make the other feel important

Winning People Over
A. Avoid arguing
B. Never say “You are wrong” (enlisted leaders will scoff reading this)
C. If you are wrong, admit it
D. Start friendly
E. Get the other to say “yes”
F. Let the other talk (LISTEN)
G. It was always the other’s idea (cultivates ownership in others)
H. See the other’s point of view
I. Sympathize (take it a step further to empathy, and yet another step to compassion)
J. Appeal to noble motives
K. Dramatize your ideas
L. Throw down (encourage competition when appropriate)

Leading
A. Begin with praise
B. Indirectly address mistakes (perhaps not applicable in the military)
C. Talk your own mistakes first (Extreme Ownership)
D. Ask questions rather than give orders (best-case scenario)
E. Let the other save face (correct in private)
F. Be hearty in approbation
G. Give the other a reputation to live up to
H. Make the fault seem easy to correct
I. Make the other happy to do your will